What to Text First: First Message Examples That Actually Get Replies

You finally have their number, and now the first text feels impossible. The goal of a first message is not to impress. It is to make replying easy. Here is a simple structure and examples you can use.

The 3-part first text

• Hi + your name, so they know who it is
• One thing you have in common, from their profile or your mutual friend
• One easy question they can answer in a sentence

Two or three lines is plenty. The longer the message, the more effort it takes to reply.

First message examples

• Set up by a friend: "Hi, it's Jake, Sam's friend! How's your week going?"
• Dog on their profile: "Hey! Your dog is adorable. What's their name?"
• Shared hobby: "I heard you run. Do you have a favorite route?"

What to avoid

• "hey" or "wyd" with nothing to answer
• Messages that are only compliments on looks
• Double or triple texting before they reply
• A first text after 11 pm

When to send it

The same evening or the next evening, roughly between 7 and 9 pm, works well. If you wait several days, their interest fades too. If they don't reply right away, give it a day before following up.

Watch the webtoon short

We turned the 30 minutes of staring at a first text into a short webtoon.

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